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Joke of the Day

"Password: 1 upper case letter, 1 lower case letter, 1 stair case, 1 briefcase, 1 in case of emergency, 2 cases of beer, and 1 quesadilla."

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".@WebMD a girl just texted me ""K"" am i going to die"
"My friend and I were talking yesterday and he asked me if I sometimes randomly recited the English vowels. I replied, ""Sometimes, why?""."
"What do you call a Chameleon that can't change colors? Reptile dysfunction."
"What did the cow say to her husband when he denied pooping in the living room? That's bullshit!"
"I told my wife that size shouldn't matter so she went out shopping and bought my ""boys room"" a new 4 inch TV."
"What is the reason for short people temper? They are closer to hell."
"You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands... For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry."
"Son: ""Hey, Dad! Can I have $20 for a blow job?"" Dad: ""I don't know, son. Are you any good?"""
"ME: why am I always anxious? maybe watching TV will help- NEWS: IF THE HURRICANE DOESN'T KILL YOU, CLOWNS WILL"
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