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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between Darth Vader and Tom Brady? Darth Vader probably gets high fived"
Next Joke
"[wife crosses out another baby name off the list] What? What's wrong with Carlos Danger Grenades?"
"What do you call a cow if he enjoys burgers? A cannibull"
"What does Johnny Depp say when cutting down trees? TIMBUUUUUUUURTON"
"At the dinner table.. Dad: So how's college these days, kid? what classes are you taking? Kid: Intro to linguistics. Ugh, it's a shitty course. Dad: Language!"
"How many tickles does it take to make an octupus laugh? Ten tickles."
"I used to be a taxi driver but I had to quit... I couldn't stand people talking behind my back."
"What's a redditors favorite Imagine Dragons song GOLD!"
"A robot walks into a bar, orders a drink, and lays down some cash. The bartender says, ""we don't serve robots."" The robot replies, ""oh, but some day you will."""
"What's the president's favorite vegetable? Barack-oli"