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Joke of the Day
"Him: Hi Me: I bet you say that to all the girls"
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"What has eyes but can't see? Hellen Keller"
"What do you call a middle eastern man with a bounty on his head? A towel head."
"Colonel Mustard invited me to the library to check out his candlestick collection, but I dunno... I got a bad feeling."
"I have a good joke. Say ""Knock knock."""
"If I had a time machine, I'd go back & mess with myself. I'd delete and retweet frog my tweets monkey with random words giraffe inserted."
"My marriage counselor told me that I suffer from premature ejaculation... I said...""I don't suffer."""
"There is a new car fragrance designed to look like the Joker... The fragrance? Tears of a clown."
"how does a bakery know when to make more bread? on a knead the dough basis"
"I just called the suicide hotline AND THEY DON'T THINK RUNNING OUT OF MAPLE SYRUP WHILE I'M EATING PANCAKES IS A REASON TO KILL MYSELFFFF!!!"