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Joke of the Day
"I never feel more American than when Hulu makes me pick my ""advertising experience."""
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"Too many people are obsessing over Frozen. They need to let it go"
"The difference between the middle finger and the fourth finger I use my middle finger to say fuck you to you.. My wife uses my fourth finger to say fuck you to me"
"I'm not hungover. I just like to wear my sunglasses when I open the fridge door. It makes me look cool."
"What's a Latino pornstar's favorite flavor profile? Umami. (Ooooooooh, mami.)"
"Because you know I'm all about that data, bout that data. No trouble. I'm all about that data, bout that data. No trouble."
"Because of the disregard towards safety techniques people not only die but are also born."
"What did Donald Trump say to the guy who immolated himself in front of Trump tower? ""You're fired!"""
"A word in this sentence is misspelled. Misspelled."
"When I heard that Dr. Heimlich died at age 96... I got all choked up."