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Joke of the Day

"how do you make pickle bread? with dill dough"

"Quite a few people aren't aware that I studied abroad for a year. Alas, she didn't teach me anything I didn't already know."

"My Wife's Accident The police knocked on my door last night, ""It looks like your wife has been in an accident,"" said one officer. ""I know,"" I replied, ""but she's good with the kids."""

"Time for a , ""How many ___ does it take to screw in lightbulb?"", thread! Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: THAT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"If you make an oriental dizzy.... does he become disoriented?"

"Went by the house where I grew up. Asked to go in to look around, but they said no and shut the door in my face. My parents can be so rude."

"(to kid at lemonade stand) i ain't buying shit until i find you on yelp"

"What did little Jonny have to say on the topic of meteorites? No comet."

"Turning on a guy is like flipping a light switch. Turning on a woman is like wiring that switch & then building a nuclear plant to power it."

"If you order a salad in Texas, you get a bowl of ranch dressing with a chunk of iceberg lettuce, 89 croutons & a chicken fried steak on top."