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Joke of the Day

"Please don't tell my three year old his oversized black calculator isn't really an iPad. He'd be crushed to learn his dad lied to him."

"What's Jay-Z's favorite city to perform in? SHEBOY-gan You're welcome"

"A groom raises his glass to toast his wife on their wedding day I've finally found a perfect girl i could not ask for more she's deaf and dumb and over sexed and owns a liquor store."

"How many Scientologists does it take to change a light bulb? What suppressive told you to change the light bulb? Report to Ethics immediately!"

"A child asks his dad... Child: ""Dad, how high is that building?"" Building: ""If I'm already built, why am I called a building?"" Dad: ""Pretty damn high."""

"Craigslist A man placed an ad on his local craigslist: ""Wife wanted"". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: ""You can have mine."""

"Why doesn't Superman need a boss? (OC) He already has supervision."

"If my girlfriend is late for work & looking for keys, I help by following her around the house & looking in exactly the same spots she does."

"What do you call a boner at a funeral? Mourning wood."

"I named my penis ""Secret"" Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman"