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Joke of the Day
"Sorry just got your text. Do you still need to go to the hospital?"
Next Joke
"What does toilet paper and the Star Trek Enterprise have in common? They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons."
"Why are there only seat belts in the end of the bus? Because #backlivesmatter"
"Some people say don't bring a knife to a gun fight but I say DONT GO TO THE GUNFIGHT AT ALL ARE YOU KIDDING ME BULLETS HURT SO BAD OMG"
"What does 100% humidity mean? Even dry farts feel like wet farts."
"My girlfriend is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with Italian food. I wouldn't put it pasta."
"Cutting out gluten is a great way to lose weight and friends"
"The first rule of dad club is shut the goddamn door on your way in, we're not trying to heat the whole outdoors here."
"My favorite pickup line is when a guy just slides an order of mozzarella sticks towards me."
"What do you call a dissection performed by drunks? An Autipsy."