77638

Joke of the Day

"A child molester, a conman and a priest walks into a bar He then sat down."

"""You haven't listened to a word I've said, have you?"" Always seems like a strange way for my wife to start a conversation with me."

"I have very poor ninja skills when it comes to staring at cleavage."

"Long term health risks include death... DOESN'T THAT END YOUR TERM?!?!?!"

"Why do cows have hooves? Because they lac tose"

"Today is my 18th wedding anniversary. If my husband doesn't give me a divorce as a gift I'm telling his girlfriend."

"*flexing arms* I'd like you to meet my two good friends, Sledge and- ""Hammer?"" Holy shit that's way cooler.. I was gonna say Sledge 2"

"It's hard to find true love these days. Even Charles Manson's fiance wanted him for his body."

"And that, Romeo, is why we usually try to take a pulse first."

"A steak pun is a rare medium well done"