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Joke of the Day

"Why did the chicken cross the road? The road crossed him first, man. The road crossed him first. *This should be delivered in your best ""tough guy"" voice.*"

"What's the most messed up trap for Santa? A Nicolas Cage."

"I don't understand why Pabst gets such a bad wrap. It won a blue ribbon Once."

"First off I want to commend you for taking part in credit counselling. Now, under assets you wrote ""like an onion"". Can you clarify?"

"what did socrates learn from the T-rex? i dino"

"What body of water is used for writing? The Apostrosea."

"People with a good sense of humor have a better sense of life."

"[date] HER: So do you like Star Wars? ME: Oh yeah HER: Who's your favorite character? ME: *nervously looking at smudged notes* Yoga"

"THE MERMAID WHY DID THE MERMAID WEAR SEASHELLS? BECAUSE SHE GREW OUT OF HER B-SHELLS !!! BADA BUM !!!"

"What did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead, I'm gonna give these two a lift."