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Joke of the Day

"Survey Says A survey found that 20% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house, and 80% kiss their house goodbye when they leave their wife."

"Urge is strong to leave work early on summer Fridays to avoid traffic. Most do it & become the traffic they sought to avoid."

"Did you here about the female thief? I heard she was a mistake"

"Seems like Hello Kitty should be a brand of condoms."

"Once again the award for the most stupid act ever was given to a man who glued his hands to the bars on a treadmill. That's two years running now."

"GUY WITH TONS OF BLACKLIGHTS AROUND HIS APARTMENT: Hey come on in! GUY WHO LIKES TO RUB CAT URINE ALL OVER HIMSELF: Ummm. Nah I'm good."

"I thought you were trying to get into shape? I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle."

"A deer walked out of a gay bar and said... I just blew ten bucks in there!"

"[wakes up next to perfectly crocheted sweater with knitting needles in hands] Oh dear god not again"

"I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is ""the stupidest country in the world."" Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world."