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Joke of the Day

"""My water-bowl wasn't filled to its usual level so I stole your watch and peed in your shoes."" --Cats"

"heres a knock knock joke for you knocks nock nock. whos there dickey doo dickey doo who ya stomach sticks out further than ya dickey doo"

"What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob? Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs, or wife, but you can't beat a blowjob."

"Addicted to pills? Don't worry. They have a pill for that."

"Have you heard about the new up and coming racially biased dice game? They're calling it nazi"

"If you have a shitty job, you probably shouldn't lick your fingers at lunch time."

"How do you piss off Winnie the Pooh? Put two fingers in his honey."

"Reddit themed Yo Momma jokes. I'll start: Yo momma so fat... ...her posts can't be upvoted."

"What's the best part about five year olds? They're hands make your cock look huge"

"When my roommate won't wash the dishes I always leave a note'hey please do the dishes, because I will wash one knife & use it in your sleep'"