76574

Joke of the Day

"When a cop tells you to ""spread 'em"" he is not flirting. I know this now."

"What did the Mexican man say after two houses fell on him? ""Get off me, homes"""

"Someone should have warned me, that when you have kids, they talk to you, like, ALL. THE. TIME."

"What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"Did you hear about the chickpeas who took a tumble? It was falafel."

"Confucius says: good to meet girl in park But better to park meat in girl"

"Bi?ch I didn't text you to exercise my fingers, I want a damn reply"

"What do you call a marine animal who under-performs at the vegetable academy? A C-cucumber."

"I wish I was able to argue about something as strongly as women do about nothing"

"No, those pants don't make you look fatter. I mean, how could they?"