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Joke of the Day
"Some kids called me fatty as I walked down the street today. I just turned the other chin."
Next Joke
"What do you call a fanny on a fanny on a fanny? A block of flaps"
"When a girl doesn't invite me up to her place after a date I just assume it's because she's a hoarder with 30 kitty cats."
"Why isn't the speed of light Asian? Because it never gets better than a 'C'."
"I like to think of myself as a guy who doesn't scare too easily but I just beat the shit out of a motion activated air freshener."
"You know what I hate about Reddit? [Removed]"
"I feel really bad for kids in third world countries... They have to go through puberty and their mid-life crisis at the same time."
"Why are there no Walmarts in Syria? Because they're all targets"
"I like my women like I like my coffee Bitter"
"if i'm bleeding out in an alley & you approach me w/an app that would save me, but i'd have to login using facebook, i'd be fine w/just dyin"