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Joke of the Day

"My local museum is trying to raise money by setting up a dinosaur fossil display. How will it work?Remains to be seen."

"If you feed your kitten Muscle Milk it will become a tiger in as little as 90 days or you get your money back."

"I bet Apple's new iPhone will be a huge 6s. (Context: https://www.reddit.com/r/apple/comments/3hgadu/apple_iphone_6s_launching_on_september_18/)"

"What is white and gold and black and blue? A blonde in a physically abusive relationship. See you guys in hell."

"Son: ""Dad! My lsd is missing!"" Dad: ""We have bigger problems son, there's a dragon in the kitchen."""

"Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in? The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!"

"What do identical stars do? Twin-kle"

"Why the plus or minus on the pregnancy test, ept? How about a simple yes or no and we'll decide if that's positive or negative."

"Waldo collapses on the beach because it's August & he's fully clothed with a ski cap. You spot him easily"

"""Yogurt!"" Gurt: ""Yes?"""