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Joke of the Day

"Who decided to call them a personal trainer and not a gym reaper?"

"I feel sorry for Eazy-E He went from Straight outta Compton to Straight outta condoms before getting aids. I'm sorry."

"If you believe you can pass a drug test by drinking large amounts of water, you're just diluting yourself."

"Don't you hate when you do something out of the kindness of your heart & someone gets upset because you shoved a pack of gum in their mouth?"

"What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A genealogist looks up the family tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush."

"Some people say it's not what you know, but who you know... I say it's not who you know, but whom you know."

"Good friends help you move. Great friends help you move bodies."

"And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the ... Paul Ryan"

"A man tries to punch a wood chipper He is unarmed."

"What does it sound like when a Pterodactyl urinates? There is no sound... The P is silent."