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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my peanut butter... Brown, chunky, and easy to spread."

"Did you hear about the tragic crash of the small plane into the cemetery? So far they've recovered 324 bodies."

"It's goofy when people pretend to zip their mouth closed to indicate keeping a secret. ""Your secret is well guarded... behind a zipper"""

"Whats the worst thing about being dyslexic and having ADHD? You think you've got AIDS"

"I hope zombies will come from Mexico. After eating their way through fat Americans, they'll be like ""Sorry little Canadians. We're full."""

"What's the difference between your mom and a pizza? A pizza doesn't beg me to keep going when I'm eating it."

"What's an Australian kiss? The same thing as a French kiss, except it's Down Under."

"4yo: When you're 9, you can drive Me: Pretty sure you have to be older 4yo: Some people can drive at 9 Me: A little older 4yo: Ya, it's 9"

"Why is the suicide rate so low for Puerto Ricans? You can't jump out of a basement apartment."

"A couple of crows were in prison the other day... They were held for attempted murder."