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Joke of the Day

"Knock knock Who's there? I eat mipe"

"What is a runner's favourite subject in school? Jog-raphy!"

"What do you with a dying chemist? Well, if you can't helium and you can't curium, all you can do is barium!"

"Why don't chickens wear pants? Because their pecker is on their face.. Thank you, good night!"

"ME: Hi, come get me. This house is weird and someone is snoring. MOM: Honey, for the last time you're not at a sleepover. You're married."

"I'm always a big fan of the prison teardrop tattoo. It says I'm sensitive but I've killed people."

"I'm off to buy a 3-D printer. Which I'll use to make another 3-D printer. Then return the first one."

"No one who heard me talking to my dog would assume that English is my first language."

"I'm should probably update everyone who wrote ""Have a great summer!"" in my high school yearbook. It was okay."

"I almost got into an accident with someone who was texting and driving... luckily I braked just in time or else I would've spilt my beer."