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Joke of the Day

"A little boy wrote to Santa Claus... One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus, ""Please send me a sister."" Santa Claus wrote him back, ""Ok, send me your mother."""

"Guy comes home to find his best friend in bed with his wife. He says: ""Jimmy, I HAVE to, but you?"""

"Isn't swallowing semen technically canibalism? I don't know, I just do it for the taste..."

"Did you know? On average, people are pretty mean."

"[bank robbery] OK EVERYBODY GET DOWN! [dave starts doing the electric slide] Damn it Dave, not you, go grab the money"

"There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris."

"Trump and Pence are so homophobic ... ... they couldn't get a mandate. HAHAHA! A lot of people are going to die in the next 4 years."

"I failed my Cultural Studies exam. The question was ""Describe the role that India plays in the modern world"". Apparently ""Tech Support"" is not the correct answer."

"What do you call the space in between Pamela Anderson's breasts? Silicon Valley"

"Life is not fair, but life is not fair for everyone. That makes life fair."