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Joke of the Day

"You know what grinds my gears? People who say they know how to drive stick because they ""watched a tutorial on YouTube""."

"I date men whom have their life paths laid out firmly and don't waver. Yes, their paths are Psycho and Socio, but consistency is admirable."

"What do you get if you put 5 lesbians and 5 politicians in the same room? 10 people who don't do dick."

"My mom's MILFshake brings all the boys to the I can't even stomach this joke."

"Repent! Seek jesus! Judgement approaches!"

"What do you call a censored DMX song? A really good instrumental"

"What would you call a Russian invasion of Alaska? Ice [Krim](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%D0%9A%D1%80%D1%8B%D0%BC)"

"Did you hear about the guy who opened a cheese store in Israel? He called it ""Cheeses of Nazareth""."

"Why do people at home on TV have their pants on?"

"What did the plant say to the runaway melons in love? You cantelope!"