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Joke of the Day

"What does a dirty hippie say after you ask him to get off your couch? Namaste"

"Hell is where Sarah Palin is president, Taylor Swift is in love with me, and Kim Kardashian names all the children"

"Matt LeBlanc was just announced as the newest presenter on BBC's Top Gear It may be a challenge for him, on his last show it's like he was always stuck in second gear"

"ME: Take care of my cat while I'm away? HITMAN: [screwing on silencer] No problem."

"Who wins most of the medals for bravery in Burger Land? The meatball heros!"

"Police officer: what'd you take, you're sweating, shaking and going crazy.... Perp: nothing sir, just searching for The Lord!"

"Everyone wants a bigger house until you have to dust Now I'm dreaming of a one room shanty inside a bubble"

"Sweetie, who is this bully stealing your pudding cup before school?!? ""Mom, it's-"" *dad makes throat slice gesture* ""No one, Mom. No one"""

"Whats better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ!"

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? ""It might take awhile for me to get hard, I got laid this morning"""