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Joke of the Day

"What do you tell the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he picks up a miniature version of his weapons? Those are the wrong Sais."

"so a singularity is something with no mass and infinite density... ...basically describing donald trump's brain."

"The internet does not make people ignorant, it just makes their ignorance visible to everyone else."

"What do you call it when someone shoots a group of fish in a barrel? A school shooting"

"What do you call a turtle with a hard on? A tank!!!! PEW PEW PEW!!"

"Three men of different ethnicities walk into a bar. The first two say something smart. The third completely embarrasses his countrymen by saying something stupid."

"I was just about to go and remind my neighbour to slam all of his car doors as many times as possible in five minutes, but there's no need."

"I went camping over the weekend... It was in tents."

"Just found some atheist propaganda in this motel room. I opened the dresser drawer and it was empty."

"Men are like plastic wrap. Cheap. Clingy. And very easy to see through."