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Joke of the Day
"Condoms are really counterproductive."
Next Joke
"The guest said to the cannibal Your wife makes a great soup. Yes, but I'll miss her."
"""Please! There's no need to interact with me. I'm just here to observe."" -me in every social situation"
"Att'n birds in my yard: the one to the LEFT of the feeder is for drinking, the one to the RIGHT is for bathing. Get it together you guys."
"[after lover's spat] ME: Honey. Lamb chop. Sweetie cakes. HER: You're just naming foods. ME: Pumpkin. Muffin. HER: ... ME: Zucchini bread."
"Knock Knock Joke Knock Knock, Who's there, King Tut, King Tut who? King-Tut-Key Fried Chicken"
"I'm jealous of all the people that haven't met you!"
"A Nazi and Jew walk into a bar.... Or was it a gas chamber i can't remember"
"My friend did some graffiti with me He just tagged along."
"What kind of bagel did the camper eat? A winnebago."