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Joke of the Day

"I once knew a girl so basic... ...that if you pushed her into a pool of acid, it'd be considered a-salt."

"Never leave Sulfuric Acid in a metal beaker That's an oxidant waiting to happen."

"What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has NO EL."

"How do you address a monster? Very politely."

"If I were to steal an experiment from a microbiology lab... ...would it be cultural appropriation?"

"People keep comparing the election to Empire Strikes Back or Revenge Of The Sith... Personally I would have gone with The Star Wars Christmas Special"

"""Sir, it appears the bomb was hidden in the Japanese man's beer!"" ""Looks like the killer... BREW his mind."""

"How many dyslexics does it screw to take in a light bulb?"

"The Human Centipede review I found it a little tongue-in-cheek... Source: Dad"

"What did Keanu Reeves say to slow down his horse? Whoa."