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Joke of the Day

"This bathroom attendant is a little overzealous. I can shake ""it"" myself. Also, I am not in the bathroom."

"I tried to become a proctologist but it was a real pain in the ass."

"We all live in a yellow submarine... ...I really wish the bathroom was working right."

"I refuse to go bungee jumping.... ... I came into this world because of a broken rubber, I'm not leaving because of one."

"Every time I walk into a Wal-Mart I think to myself, "" I've never seen so many of God's mistakes all in one place."""

"When I was a child, I remember lying with my eyes closed waiting for Santa to come.Then there was the awkward silence as he got dressed and left."

"What do you call a combination of a joke and a rhetorical question?"

"clever pupil makes fool his teacher PUPIL: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do? TEACHER: off course not. PUPIL: good, because I didn't do my homework."

"Reddit accounts should be treated like underwear. If you can keep them clean you could keep the same one for a while, but if you flood them with shit you should get a new one."

"What's your father's name? Teacher: What's your father's name? Kid: Joke!! Teacher: (irritatingly) are you kidding? kid: Nopes, he's my brother, I am joking!!"