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Joke of the Day
"I got a job crushing cans at the supermarket... It was Soda Pressing."
Next Joke
"""Check, please!"" - Me, at a restaurant begging the waiter to make sure there are no monsters under the table"
"Why is your paper blank? Teacher: Why is your paper blank? Student: Sometimes silence is the best answer ! :D :D"
"What did the traffic light say to the car? Don't look at me I'm changing."
"I fell sick today when I wore crocs... I am Lacoste intolerant."
"Rise and shine all the beautiful women of the world. Ugly women, go back to sleep, your time is coming, at night."
"How many teamsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 19 . Got a problem with that?"
"Why can't Africa have Volkswagen beetles? Because an elephant will screw anything with a trunk in the front. Thanks to a random guy outside of a 7/11."
"Since we're at it: Dating in your 30s is like registering a domain name... The good ones are all taken. But you can always get one from an exotic country..."
"An Ancient Roman walks into a bar.. Holds up two fingers and says ""Five glasses of wine please""."