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Joke of the Day

"Is that a burrito in your pocket or are you happy to see me? I'm cool if it's a burrito."

"A selfie stick is very useful..... .. as a prod to keep people out of your personal space."

"Perhaps Voldemort's face is flat because he ran into the wrong wall at the train station."

"A Man Is Reading An r/Jokes Post... ""Heh heh, that's pretty humorous... ...Just like my arm bone."""

"Trump Jesus asked the Devil if he'd made a deal with Donald Trump. The Devil said they'd negotiated for a while but eventually he gave up and just let Trump buy him out."

"My friend said his baby is sooo smart but the stupid idiot can't even figure out his way home when I forget him on the bus"

"I'm the only child in my family. My mom said she learns from her mistakes."

"I have the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the Lincoln Park Zoo"

"So a man walks into a... All you just got to do is finish it."

"I don't quite get women who have like 15 bridesmaids. I don't even like 15 people altogether in my life."