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Joke of the Day

"So sex workers ever post anything that's nsfw?"

"Bernie Sanders to cut the BS Now wants to be called Ernie Anders"

"I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. (I worked there my freshman year and had to unclog the toilets.)"

"Wife: for the last time buy a terrarium Me: [drops 7 lizards into my shirt] why they already have a home"

"- We buried my mother-in-law yesterday. - Sorry to hear that. When did she die? - My guess would be sometime this morning."

"[Scooby & the gang catch a regular guy] ""Let's see who this ghost really is!"" No! Wait, I'm not- [rip off face] *gasps* ""OLD MAN SKELETON?"""

"Give a man a jacket He will be warm for the winter. Teach a man to jacket, he will never leave the house."

"What is a creationist's favorite button in pokemon? B to cancel evolution"

"A boy sat on a train chewing gum and staring vacantly into space when suddenly an old woman sitting opposite said 'It's no good you talking to me young man I'm stone deaf !'"

"I don't like referencing Not et al."