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Joke of the Day

"A black guy walks into a police station in Florida and he never comes out."

"Why do Italians throw pizza onto the field after they win a match? Because they rain supreme."

"Married foreplay is just five minutes of confusion about whether your spouse is using a suggestive euphemism or asking you to do a chore."

"Eat, Pray, Love was such a boring movie, I watched it on a plane and people still walked out."

"Why don't my dog and my cat get along? She's a Re-puppy-can and he's a Demo-cat!"

"Uma Thurman's eyes are so wide apart...... she can accurately measure the distance to the moon using parallax."

"Kid: would you rather be the Evil Queen or the Wicked Witch? M: I'd rather be the Mom K: ooh, right. Much scarier."

"I've finally taken the time to list my collection of John Lennon memorabilia on eBay. Imagine all the PayPal."

"Getting married at 18 sounds a lot like leaving a party at 9:30pm."

"""My imaginary friend is better than yours!"" ~ religion."