197490

Joke of the Day

"Married foreplay is just five minutes of confusion about whether your spouse is using a suggestive euphemism or asking you to do a chore."

"Do you know the difference between genius and stupid? ""Genius has its limits."""

"When I find something in my purse on the first reach-in I feel like I should get some applause or something."

"Me and my horse walked into a bar... The bartender said, ""Why the wrong case?"""

"Whenever I think of a funny status I always get a pen and write it down so I can use it later, and if the pen is too far away I just convince myself that it wasn't that funny anyway."

"In Gaza Strip... ...Kykes gas you!"

"My 5 y/o's best Knock Knock joke yet Knock knock Who's there? Monkey balls Monkey balls who? Don't you mean monkey *bars*?"

"This mouthbreathing, fat creepy dude at work baked a cake and wrote, ""Eat cake if you want to be my girlfriend"" on it. I'm so torn right now"

"I like my women just like my beer. Bound together with plastic."

"What do rednecks do on Halloween? Pumpkin."