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Joke of the Day

"When Copernicus said the Earth goes around the sun I don't think he appreciated the gravity of the situation. Science. History. Punnery."

"I was just making a sandwich when I thought to myself, So, there is a downside to divorce'."

"This clown fad is getting out of hand.... They are even running for president of the United States."

"I entered the word bit*h into my GPS and guess what, I'm in your driveway!!"

"HIPPO: I'm really heavy ZIPPO: I'm a little lighter"

"I started a band called 1023 Megabytes We're pretty good but we haven't gotten a gig yet"

"[parole hearing] OFFICER: are u reformed? ME: I O: go on M: I th O: tell us M: I'm O: yes M: can I finish my sentence O: ok parole denied"

"How do you kill a circus clown ? You go for the juggler"

"Due to the rising cost of ammunition I will no longer be able to provide a warning shot. Thanks for your understanding."

"I hate when you're trying to be cheesy but everyone is laughtose intolerant."