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Joke of the Day
"What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?"
Next Joke
"Why can't America ever win a chess tournament? Because they're missing two towers"
"Michael Brown, Freddie Gray... The police really don't like colored people."
"Ladies, call me Adobe Updater, because I nag you at least once a week and never seem to work"
"[at funeral] Me: ""I'm sorry your husband died in that boating accident in Venice"" Widow: ""please no.... Me: ""you have my gondolances"""
"What did one eye say to the other? Between you and I, something smells."
"6: Daddy the floor is lava! Me: Oh yeah? *Pushes wife off chair*"
"Damn girl, are you french? Cause madayuum"
"What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller."
"You guys have been the worst hostages I've ever used, hands down. *everyone lowers their hands* GODDAMN IT!!"