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Joke of the Day

"My mom bought me a bottle of whiskey as a Xmas gift... She seemed a little upset that I said she should've mailed it ahead of her visit."

Next Joke
 
"I'm training to be a sniper in the Communist Revolutionary Forces... ... I'll be the designated Marxman!"
"What do you call a blonde at a golf course.. ..the 19th hole"
"I wonder if people with speech impediments get receding hair lips as they get older?"
"I went to buy some classical music today... But I forgot my Chopin Liszt."
"How to make an idiot curious? I'll post the answer tomorrow."
"Did you know... That 80% of all stats are made up?"
"My girlfriend refused to give me a blowjob She's allergic to nuts"
"If grandmothers say ""love you to the moon and back"" Do gay men say ""love you to Uranus and back""?"
"If alcohol kills germs and laughter is the best medicine, I'm the healthiest mofo on this planet."