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Joke of the Day

"What did the handyman do... when he got his girlfriend in bed with him for the first time? He screwed, nutted, and bolted."

"What is the difference between being hungry and horny? What she means by ""eating out."""

"You haven't Instagramed what you had for dinner yet? Please hurry up, the suspense is killing me."

"What's a French person's favorite video game system? The Wii! (Oui)"

"What does a guy call his diabetic girlfriend? Sweet Pee"

"Archeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined ""victim"" as ""one who has encountered Chuck Norris"""

"Always get double toppings on take out pizza so you can eat one of the toppings off as an appetizer during your drive home."

"A woman was on trial for murdering her husband with his guitar. The judge asked, ""First offender?"" She replied, ""No. First it was the Gibson, then the Fender."""

"How do you make a dog meow? Put him in a wood chipper and listen to him go ""meeeooowwww"""

"What is something that everyone overlooks no matter how hard they try not to? Their nose"