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Joke of the Day

"I want to die in my sleep like my grandad Not screaming and crying like his passengers."

"What did Stevie Wonder's younger brother think their parents named him after British royalty? Because they named him Stevie Twoder."

"First time I got high was pretty intense. I was in the back seat of my brothers car. Must have been some good shit since I'm an only child."

"If you ever get cold, just go hang out in a corner... They are usually 90 degrees."

"What do you call a group of rappers that masturbate in synchronization? Bone Tugs In Harmony"

"Hey girl, are you an F5 key? Cause that ass is refreshing."

"President of Columbia has announced that the country is going into severe economic depression... ...since the deaths of Amy Winehouse and Whitney Houston."

"I'm Cherokee and German... I can walk a trail but I can't finish a race."

"What if a man existed w/one hand that's a steak and the other is lobster plus unlimited salad bar? This is the plot of Edward Sizzlerhands"

"So, 50 Cent is accepting Bitcoin for his new album. Which is all well and good, but if he really wanted to court the cryptocurrency community, he should change his stage name to 0.0007745 ."