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Joke of the Day
"Turns out buying that meth lab on craigslist was illegal"
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"Fired from my court room sketch artist job, for putting thought bubbles on people's heads saying ""The court room sketch artist is so hunky."""
"Most of us were taught to never get in cars with strangers, so taxi cabs make absolutely no sense."
"Why is Sigma good at sharing? Because he only ever takes sum of the numbers!"
"Did you hear about the dyslexic KKK member? He went around killing gingers."
"My friend asked me for some inspiration for a Halloween costume. Apparently ""The Emperor's New Clothes"" was a bad idea."
"I ate 4 bowls of delicious alphabet soup. After that I had a massive vowel movement."
"What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a bowling alley? Elaine"
"Had the words ""I love you"" tattoed on my dick. Wife made me remove it because... she said I was always trying to put words into her mouth."
"I dropped my phone in the bath. I dropped my phone in the water. I put it in rice to dry out, it works now but i lost all my contacts except for my uncle bens."