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Joke of the Day

"How do you get your girlfriend to fart? Pull out"

"What is the difference between Virging and non-virgin ? Virgin doesn't give a fuck."

"So Tiger will be back for The Masters? I was really hoping he'd wait until The Player's Championship. The man's comedic timing is terrible."

"Imagine a guy named Kyle walking into Starbucks. You're a racist."

"It is impossible to simultaneously keep up a) hope and b) with the Kardashians."

"The Asian Grading Scale is... A++ (100.01%+)=Average FA+ (0-100%)=Find new famaree who can accept your white peoples grade."

"The inventor of the Oxford Comma has died. Tributes have been lead by JK Rowling, his wife and the Queen of England."

"A man calls in sick... ""It's my eyes,"" he says. ""What's wrong with them?"" his boss asks. ""I just can't see myself coming to work today."""

"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants In case he gets a hole in one"

"A therapist and his client play a word association game and the therapist asks, ""What's the first word that comes to mind after the word 'pork'?"" ...he responds, ""U pine."""