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Joke of the Day
"What happened when the joke about terrorists got to the front page? It blew up"
Next Joke
"Bernie will win the 2020 Democratic Nomination... ...because his supporters will be old enough to vote."
"How to tie the strongest knot ever: 1) put some earbuds in your pocket 2) wait one minute"
"My girlfriend started smoking... My girlfriend started smoking last night, so I slowed down and applied lubricant."
"A priest, rapist, and pedophile walk into a bar He orders a drink"
"I combined National Pancake Day with International Women's Day Took my wife to IHOP and ordered a stack of pancakes for myself, and 8/10ths of a stack for her."
"Inspirational Tweet: Found the sock gone missing 7 weeks ago in today's clean laundry. Sometimes they come back, people. Keep the faith."
"Playing dead for the alarm clock doesn't seem to be working"
"You remind me of my little toe Why because I'm so cute and tiny? No, I will probably get drunk later and bang you the coffee table."
"Why did the walrus go to the tupperware store? Because he wanted a tight seal."