69496

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a sniper with bad eyesight and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit, the other hoots but can't sh..."

"What's worse than being struck by a lightning? Being struck by an iMac."

"""Retweet! Retweet!"" yelled the German Commander as we invaded Normandy"

"How is a Buddhist monk and a bumblebee alike? They are both peaceful, but when pissed off have a tendency to burn."

"Today I was asked by a Red Cross member if I could help towards the floods in Pakistan I said I would, but I don't have a hose that reaches that far"

"What's the difference between today's most sophisticated encryption that can still be cracked and the still uncracked ciphers of the Zodiac Killer? Ted Cruz"

"Whoever invented popcorn deserves the Medal of Honor for not panicking after the first 45 seconds."

"Samsung users are like... ""Im glad Samsung is finally blowing up."""

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Gagged. Credit to my house-mate for this gem!"

"Why did the condom fly around the room? It was pissed off."