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Joke of the Day

"Some kid on xbox live told me he had *** with my mom I told him my mother has AIDS."

"The secret to juggling chainsaws is making sure people don't see your lips move when you make the chainsaw sounds."

"My friends told me we were going for a ride and I called ""Shotgun""... ... they did'nt tell me we we're actually going for a drive-by. FML :("

"I just broke up with my blind girlfriend. We just didn't see eye to eye anymore."

"I quit cold turkey. I just reheat it now."

"Doctor, Doctor, I'm addicted to twitter... Sorry, I don't follow you."

"Why did the skeleton knew that it was going to rain? He read the weather forecast, Idiot (Wow didnt see that coming did you *wink*)"

"Tried to watch some porn last night but I couldn't buy into the plot... There were just too many holes"

"Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors? If it had 4 it would be a chicken sedan"

"Why did Helen Keller play the piano with one hand? Because she used the other to sing"