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Joke of the Day

"what do you call gay paramedics? First-AIDS"

"its shanksgiving, be thankful i havent stabbed u yet."

"The proper way to make a Caesar salad is to repeatedly stab it with dozens of other people in a Senate building."

"I can't wait for the stage of capitalism where we have to watch a 15 second advertisement before we remember a memory."

"There are some benefits to having alzheimers For example, you get to meet new people constantly."

"I was cumming into a sock... when the guy wearing it was like WTF?!"

"When I get a prescription for drugs, I don't ask, Will it work? Are there any side effects?' No, it's Can I drink with these?'"

"What do you call an insignificant underage coal digger? A minor minor miner"

"The first couple months of the year go by quickly. February just Marches on."

"I wonder if Taylor Swift ever gets one of her songs stuck in her head and also wants to kill herself"