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Joke of the Day
"I'm only good for two things... Self-defecating and self-deprecating."
Next Joke
"What is the difference between Saint Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day? On Saint Patrick's Day everybody wants to be Irish."
"Why can't you hang out with bears? Their bad breath is un-bear-able."
"To the person crowding me in the checkout line, do you want a hug .. 'cause if you get any closer, I'm gonna assume you do and give you one."
"Waiter waiter! What's this creepy crawly thing doing in my dinner? Oh that one ? he comes here every night."
"Can I borrow your cellphone? I need to call animal control cause I just saw a fox!"
"You need glasses when you do maths Because it helps with division. -Barbara from Rooster Teeth"
"I've been invited to an avoidance. An avoidance? What's that? It's a dance for people who hate each other."
"What part of the Vatican is made entirely out of amino acids? The Cysteine Chapel"
"What do you call 4 Mexicans in quicksand? quatro cinco"