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Joke of the Day

"Any dude who waits for Valentines Day to treat his woman like a Queen is failing 364 days a year."

"What's the cheapest kind of noodle you can buy? Penne."

"A new study shows body-image issues start as young as 3. How awful. That means 2-year-olds with gross bodies think they look okay."

"What suicidal space creature did Kirk find on the Enterprise? A Tribble with troubles."

"Hubby wanted to start the new year out with a bang So I shot him.."

"My dog was diagnosed with diabetes. Its okay though, I only had to give her one shot. I chose a .357 magnum."

"Why did the Italian miss his dinner? It'a was'a pasta his bed time"

"Vincent van Gogh called... He wants his ear back... so that he can hear you on the telephone."

"Important copyright notice Remember, if you sing ""Happy Birthday"" to the Queen, it is still *not* royalty-free."

"Why don't bats sleep outside? You ever deal with a sunburned asshole?"