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Joke of the Day
"How do most rappers build a following? They go shopping at a department store."
Next Joke
"flight attendant: sir, are you raising your hand me: how do i access the wifi fa: im doing safety announcements me: is that lowercase"
"What does a cow use to solve math problems? A *cow*culater. I made it up myself, so don't groan at the pun."
"40-32/2=4! (-1)12 <3 Maths"
"[couples therapy] Mrs: he's too handsy, always touching me all over... Mr: [who is an octopus] I CANT HELP IT LINDA IM LIKE 90% HANDS..."
"How do you play the Oscar Pistorius drinking game? When your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, take two shots."
"But if two men get married, they'll BOTH be stupid in detergent commercials and then no one will buy the correct detergent."
"Why can't you trust an atom? Because they make up everything."
"Why doesn't Mexico live up to it's full potential in the Olympics? Because all the Mexicans that can run, jump, and swim are in America."
"What's six inches long, has two nuts, and gives women big bellies? Almond Joy."