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Joke of the Day
"I always keep a gun in my pocket so people won't think I'm happy to see them."
Next Joke
"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Welcome to the jungle. Happy Birthday to you. - Christina Aguilera at a kid's birthday party."
"How did Feminism start? With an unlocked kitchen door"
"Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book? It's called ""One More Thyme"""
"I've noticed... I've noticed, if you're scared of spiders they always turn up in your bedroom. So by using that logic... I'm scared of blonde girls with big boobs."
"""Help! I can't get my jogging trousers off!"" ""We'll have to perform an emergency trackybottomy"""
"With what do Mexicans use to cut pizza? Little Ceasars"
"What's white and smells like black paint? The freshly painted fence. What's black and smells like white paint? The 6 year old who painted it"
"Pick something up. You just applied more force on that object than the gravity of an entire planet. Earth, do you even lift?"
"Of course most gay men dress well... they spent more than enough time in the closet!"