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Joke of the Day

"""Help! I can't get my jogging trousers off!"" ""We'll have to perform an emergency trackybottomy"""

"What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAAAAAAAND EYYEEEEEEEE"

"i want a google chrome plugin that's a todolist manager and the way you launch it is, you visit twitter, but it shows your todos instead"

"A 13-pound baby was born in GERMANY?? C'mon Mississippi, this is why we keep you around"

"So I was talking to a feminist the other day... The trial is next week"

"Superman: Who's gonna be Batman? *leaves Earth*"

"What do a 9 volt battery and a woman's asshole have in common? You know you don't want to, but eventually you are going to lick them both"

"My horoscope says I will meet the woman of my dreams today. Not sure how my wife will take the news but I'm pretty damn excited."

"No Brett, I didn't even read that email. I'm not speaking to you because I overheard your Starbucks order this morning."

"The best joke on reddit (OC)"