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Joke of the Day

"No matter what people think of you, walk around with your head held high. Multiple chins are not cute."

"Just read a really great tweet that was 140,000 characters long called a book."

"I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey. But I turned myself around."

"Now do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head."

"Why are sandwiches better in space? They are always a bit METEOR!"

"Today I watched a donkey look both ways before crossing the street... ... he was a smart ass."

"Why are lesbians statistically more poor than the average person? Because they eat out every night."

"Best time to go to the dentist? tooth hurty"

"Why is it so hard to keep track of counting in Afghanistan? Because of the Taliban (say it out loud)"

"Yo mama so fat When she taps on the QWERTY Keyboard 26 letters pop out."