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Joke of the Day

"I'm Hungary I'm Russian to the kitchen to czech the fridge There is turkey But it's covered in Greece There's Norway I can eat that. Edit:spelling"

"HEY,,,I've already lined up an auctioneer to read my eulogy...... No one likes drawn out funerals.... You're welcome."

"My Canadian 4yo just told me he wants to be Captain America if anyone wants to take a traitor off my hands."

"How did the leper hockey game end? There was a face off in the corner."

"Firing Squad 2 men lined against a wall ready to be shot by a fireing squad..""have you any last requests""says the soldier...Yes says the man..can we stand behind the wall..."

"What's the pound's new name? The ounce"

"Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206."

"I used to know a guy who had five legs. His pants fitted him like a glove."

"It must be tough to live in Europe. There's neither land nor way.."

"Say what you will about Fidel Castro, at least he didn't use a private email server."