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Joke of the Day

"My bitch of a Grandma just made me cookies with Raisins in them."

"I'm dyslexic and wanted to write Santa But Satan showed up."

"OMG, GODZILLA IS COMING TO ATTACK NEW ENGLAND AND WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE-oh, he said huge blizzard, not lizard... Carry on then."

"What's the difference between Michael j. Fox and an earthquake? Earthquakes stop shaking"

"A priests asks the convicted murderer...... A priests asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, ""Do you have any last requests?"" ""Yes,"" replies the murderer. ""Can you please hold my hand?"""

"I got a case of beer for my wife! It was a good trade!"

"I've been saving up for a sex change, I don't care what my wife says. SHE'S GOING TO HAVE IT!"

"Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: ""Does this taste funny to you?"""

"A preschooler refused to sleep during naptime... He was charged with resisting a rest"

"What happens when a man of jewish descent runs into a wall with an erection? He breaks his nose."