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Joke of the Day

"Here's a double entendre joke I made up Why do grump pedophiles like cats? They're assholes..."

"I think some drugs should be legalized... but cocaine is where I draw the line."

"What do you call an anorexic chick with a yeast infection?? Quarter pounder with cheese"

"I'm gonna drink until she's pretty then fuck her until she's ugly again."

"So there are 2 fish in a tank... And one says to the other: ""Hey, how do you drive this thing??"""

"What are Isreali candies known for? A jewy center"

"UGH, I was planning this big romantic dinner for two and then my wife called to say she'd be home."

"The thing about the holocaust is... It was the experience of a lifetime."

"[on phone] ""Press 1 if you're a huge nerd"" ""Press 2 if you're a virgin"" ""Press 3 if y-"" STOP TALKING, DAD! I'm trying to call Xbox support"

"When a dog is in heat, it means it wants sex. That is my defense!"