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Joke of the Day

"Imagine falling in love with someone and finding out they raise their hand at the end of a long boring meeting to ask a question."

"Why did the chickens cross the road? I had to get back to my car from KFC"

"Well, son, when a man loves a woman very much he expresses that love by slowly transforming into a human sloth."

"What do you tell a worried guitar? Don't fret"

"After 9 months and 347 pics of you being pregnant you REALLY only need to post one pic of the baby as proof. We believe you."

"What does the chicken says to the other chicken? Nothing."

"If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck, it might be a grebe. Know your waterfowl."

"What does the earth eat for breakfast? Continental breakfast, served on tectonic plates."

"DOCTOR: We were all out of blood for your transfusion so we used Mountain Dew ME: [I don't hear bc I already snowboarded out the window]"

"What do you call a female deer that's pickled? A dill doe"